Stand-Up Comedy The Book, by Judy Carter
Stand-Up Comedy. The Book.
You’ll probably find it on The Shelf. And if it doesn’t go down well, on The Sidewalk, outside The Goodwill, as it starts to The Rain.
After that intro, it’s worth pointing out this is a classic text.
So let’s see if I can rip it to shreds.
Once you pass the intro that promises people with a sense of humour can be funny, it’s on to The Funny Test.
Do you joke about your own shortcomings? I can’t when I don’t have any.
Were you the class clown? No, but I carried the makeup.
Do people often repeat your lines? Depends how much cocaine I’ve left on the table.
It asks more questions, but due to a looming copyright infringement suit, I will stop there. Also, that’s my best joke, so I’ll crawl away quietly.
Save your tomatoes for the live act.
Oh, and there’s also mention of how quickly you can come up with sarcastic remarks. Find out how quick I am, at the bottom of my next 2,000 word ramble.
Still in the Roman numerals, it’s The Six Lame Excuses for Not Getting Onstage. Things are cited like, “they didn’t have an access ramp.”
Really, you’ll see they are pretty lame. Makes you wonder why they were included at all.
Then it’s the first page, and first chapter, with Getting Started. There’s a tiny bit of talk, before it moves on to Five Big Secrets to Making People Laugh.
Without saying too much, this means not telling jokes and not telling stories. Basically, Judy Carter wants you on stage with your mouth taped shut.
And it probably would be quite funny to see you up there, in an arena of 10,000, flapping your arms wildly and screaming through some Duck Max. If you can sustain that for an hour, you’ll be good for at least five comedy specials.
That’s how comedy legend Richard Pryor made his name, so if you want to follow in his footsteps, and find out the other three secrets, you’ll have to buy the book.
After them, it’s straight to the first of 33 workshops (they’re all very straightforward and simple to follow). The first one begins with a pretty analytical attempt to familiarise with routines.
Then come some more.
And while the workshops pull you along, chapter two’s premise is immediately challenging; that is, that your life will present you with tons of material.
Which means you can save the tomatoes for someone else. My act is done.
Anyway, back to you, the book’s potential reader, and the focus of this review. Maybe you should persevere………..hang on, come back. It’s only another 150 pages.
And it’s about attitude, coming to you as prep for workshop 3. You’re pointed in the right direction with some suitable topics and questions about your life.
Up to this point — and beyond it — everything is nice and plain spoken. Carter doesn’t take her time with any unnecessaries. In fact, she hands over the information faster than something very, very, extremely fast.
Yeah, whatever. These are my jokes, get out.
The questions in these pages are just enough to get you going. How far you go with them is entirely up to you.
Then more info comes in the way of what to avoid on stage.
Fair enough, it’s good to see it, but don’t insult the read’er’’s’’ intelligence; everyone knows to avoid certain material, both as a performer, and from the stand point of being a well balanced human being.
That said, without this book, all comics would open, do their middle, and close with racist material. It’s only that it’s written here we know not to.
Thanks Judy.
Really, there’s nothing bad about her advice, and potentially objectionable subjects get all the words they need. Not many.
The dirty bit — where you stick your coffee cup — is rounded up with a nice few lines from an act of then comic — now director — Jordan Brady.
After mentioning it a little above, workshop 3 begins. In doing the exercise, you’ll already have sensed this publication’s recurring theme; emotion.
That is, primarily guilt. Why did you spend good money on this book?
Yeah, so back to it, and you’ll find Carter’s exercises help you play with your emotions. These will go with the topics of your choice, to form the basis of your act.
Included joke examples — by professional comics and the author’s students — help break up the workshops, which come at you fast. The first 13 are over by the end of the first chapter, on page 44.
Also on that page, the chapter summary, which informs you that you’ll have quite a bit of material down at this point.
Probably down the toilet.
But chapter three can fix things, with it’s offer for a free plunger. You’ll want to work those arms and get those biceps pumpin’.
Still stuck? I’m not going any further with that… I guess I’m blocked.
Chapter three starts with formulas. In short, it’s about condensing things.
Carter.
The author.
Asks you to review your material, and if you haven’t already got anything usable from all the other workshops, that’s ok.
Well, it’s not her career, is it?
Pages 50, 51 & 52, are a difficult few to get through. When Carter asks you to review your material, there’s a process to stick to, because what you’ve created isn’t really meant to be funny. But you’ll also need that unfunny material to take on stage and get laughs.
Confused? Don’t worry. Just remember Garry Shandling endorsed the book.
So believe in the process.
Think about it.
If he were still around, he’d be waiting in the wings while you perform, urging you on, to hurry up and get off stage, because he’s far greater than you’ll ever be.
No, really, I’m sure he’d encourage you the right way; to never come back.
There are always filler acts.
Cheap jibes aside, the chapter’s focus is to get your material tight.
There are bits to help you identify what it looks like on the page, with a handy example from one of Carter’s students. The overly long set up has near three lines of strike through, to show you how it’s done.
If you’re still not sure, the best tip is to take a pen, or permanent marker, and move in a horizontal line.
With all the white spaces between comic quotes, the pages continue quickly, and you soon take in another couple of workshops. One deals with sarcasm, while the other has an interesting look at setups and punches.
They’re two really good workshops.
As the book continues apace, you’ll be on chapter four in only another 20 pages. Across them, they include 6 extra things to help you get laughs.
You know, things like going onstage with your fly down. Squeezing into tight trousers. Or wearing an ill fitting bra.
Liberate yourself! Set that bra on fire! Just remember the fire retardant skin paint.
After those top ideas of mine, Judy Carter gives you six of her own (they’re not really hers, but they’re given her spin). These get covered by a workshop each, with more stand up lines from comics and students, to help you on your way.
Just a word of warning; the David Spade line is in very questionable taste.
Otherwise, the Have you ever noticed set ups, will sound pretty clichéd if you keep using them, but you’ve got more sense than that.
I mean, you’re reading this review. So you’ll also be able to understand the irony.
By the end of workshop 24, you’ll be up to chapter four.
It’s about styles, and it’s pretty throwaway stuff. At one part in it, Carter’s advice on political humour amounts to having an understanding of what you’re talking about.
Bringing that up to date, it would mean knowing Trump is affiliated to the Democrats, and Biden with the Republicans.
I mean, come on, this is basic.
To sum up the chapter — you can do this, you can do that.
There’s a little bit on abortion some may not want to read; it’s there to inform how particular material can work at some venues, and not in others.
While it doesn’t come under any workshop, there’s some good info in the 1 ½ pages devoted to creating characters. In it, there’s an exercise by late actress and improv teacher, Cynthia Szigeti, which actually makes the chapter worthwhile.
So thatcomes to a close, and you’re told any style is usually inherent. Great advice. Must be why Al-Qaeda recruits aren’t suited to stand-up.
Because they’re always bombing.
The book moves on to getting material in order. That means, how to approach openings, segues, set lists, and closing the act. Once more, the workshops come along, with the help of more example bits to aid the process.
This leads to the stage time section of the book. Pre-performance gets presented in a countdown format; what to do two hours before, thirty and fifteen minutes pre-act, ten five minutes to go, and what to expect in the last 30 seconds before you step on stage.
A nice touch, but would have been better if there were paragraphs to cover other times before the show. Like a bit for ten seconds, one for eight seconds, five seconds and three.
Instead, you’re left in the dark.
Actually, there are some useful pointers, and the format makes a good read. The particular example at fifteen minutes, of the Geri Jewell and potentially risky Lotus Weinstock opener, shows you how each moment can be used effectively.
Oh, and the twenty minutes, that tell of how Judy Carter got herself an opening spot for Prince. That’s another good bit.
After that, a couple of pages to cover stage time itself, and tips for microphone usage. Steer it towards one orifice, not another, things like that.
Then there’s bombing.
It’s certainly comforting to see the names of big stars who bombed, and the thought processes about it. You’ll see mention of Andy Kaufman, Sam Kinison, Jay Leno & Jerry Seinfeld.
Carter gives you three strategies to cope with bombing. And you’ll need them. Especially after you’ve read this book.
No, no, that’s too far. I take that one back (but will keep it for my private collection).
Wait, why did I leave here?
There’s also the workshop with a secret weapon to deal with bombing. You’ll see this crop up now and again elsewhere, but given this book was first published in 1989, it could have been the first book to show it.
And it’s a really top idea, so it’s inclusion here is welcome. As are the Letterman and Carson quotes, that give another perspective to dying on stage.
In this most sensitive part of the book, Judy Carter has delivered.
Moving on, a page about hecklers, and a few comics’ lines aimed at them. There’s also a page on the use of dialogue with the audience.
It can be difficult, so best wait until you are a bit more experienced. Then go for it.
The run to the stage door isn’t far.
Get your gavel ready, because the book moves on to Judging Yourself. It’s few pages are encouraging, while to further assist, are the ever present workshops.
The first segues from a bit by comedian Larry Miller. It certainly shows how even small changes to material can make the difference between no laughs and a funny line.
Chapter eight deals with getting rich. Will it be in comedy?
I’ve already made it. That’s why I’m here.
The Places to Perform When Starting Out shows difficulties are to be expected, and the info is delivered in an amusing way.
A good start. Followed by something a little questionable.
Would you tell white lies just for stage time? Have a look in this book for a couple of inventive ideas (not necessarily the author’s).
The chapter shows you some of Carter’s students’ self made events. A few solid ideas here, so take note.
Then there are tips for making a video (still relevant today, despite format changes), while the best bit discusses colleges.
The advice on making it to television is on point. Consider it, and how it still relates to today, so you’re protected from overnight failure.
You read that right.
And you’ve made to the final chapter. It’s only two pages.
Carter says to forget everything she’s told you.
Thanks a lot. It would have been a much easier review and a much shorter read had she started like that.
Stand Up Comedy, The Pamphlet.
The author closes the book with the line,
F**k ’em if they can’t take a joke.
That’s all very well if you’re playing to a small audience, but if it’s a crowd of a few hundred, it’ll be a long night.
Be sure to bring protection.
Note
(I really USA’d it up at the beginning of this story. Here’s the British version, and what I should have patriotically written. What I meant to say was;
Stand-Up Comedy. The Book.
You’ll probably find it on The Shelf. And if it doesn’t go down well, on The Pavement, outside The Oxfam, as it starts to The Rain.
Yep, I sold out.)
Verdict
Judy Carter gets you going with her take on a comedy stream of consciousness. There’s a bit more to it than that.
As a read, it very easy, with nothing up for confusion, and plenty of exercises (workshops), to move you along and get your material down.
A nice addition to any collection.
Recommended for:
Coming up with a bulk load of material.
Putting yourself in different states to find what works for you.
Not for:
There’s a little bit of depth lacking in places, but otherwise, not too much to complain about.
Other thoughts
It pairs nicely with other books. One is Greg Dean’s book, which comes with a completely different slant. Read that was well, and combine the best bits that work for you.
Length
204 pages and at least a dozen in Roman numerals. But 30 pages for the comedy club list appendix, plenty of white spaces between quotes, large margins, blank lines for workshop answers, a point larger text, numerous comedian photos throughout….
Make it about 150 of easy read pages.
Quicker readers will be through the book in a day.
Slower, more dedicated people, will take about a week.
However quickly you can read, it will take a lot longer if you fully commit yourself to the workshops.
